My youngest child got the information on her college graduation today. It’s time to order the cap and gown, the tassel, the cord & the announcements. We’ve already scheduled her photo session to capture her senior picture. By Christmas Day, I will have completed a journey that began 24 years ago: my children are adults and no longer need a mom looking after them. How do I successfully push the youngest chick out of the nest when that chick feels responsible for taking care of me? What changes do I have to make to convince her to trust her own wings and live her own life? And then what?
My husband and I had talked about this time in our lives and what we would do with the next phase. Terry had dreams of riding motorcycles across the country, just the two of us. He talked of living in a smaller town and moving at a slower pace. I wasn’t particularly interested in the motorcycle part, but that’s not really relevant any longer. I moved to Houston right after I graduated from college and never intended to stay more than a few years. Is it time to move on? Since my kids are quite content to remain here, am I the one that needs to fly the coop? Do I really have any reason to stay?
I’ve always believed that God has called me to serve others. Supporting Terry in his ministry fit my own calling like a glove. I’ve filled various positions of service since his death, but I’m still searching for a true fit. Recently, a couple I’ve known from my single days sold everything and moved to Kenya to serve in the mission field. Am I brave enough to give up everything for a new life? I don’t know. It’s easy to just rock along with the status quo. But easy isn’t always best.
I think that I just long to go home. And home is not in this world. So, until that time when I’m called to my eternal home, I’ll keep searching for where I can best serve. It may be right here where I am. Or, it may be time to go back to north Texas. I will continue to put out feelers and look for options. I’m not done yet.